StillMorphing, IntoWhat, IHaveNoIdea.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Too many things happened over these few days. I am not as noble as I thought. I'm finally awoken from my fairytale. You are no longer indispensible, no longer irreplaceable. You are the history, someone who was so important in my life, at a point of time. You are still important, just no longer as important, and I'm no longer at that point of my life.

Amy said that I'm a realistic woman-to-be. I know what I want. I work for it. But I just can never ever make my feelings known. Even if I have to bring it to my grave, so be it. I will never tell you whatever I have done so that you will feel guilty and see the need to reciprocate. Life goes on. Nothing stays the same. I am no longer the me in secondary school, no longer the me in junior college, no longer the me in haising. I am the me now, in university. Goals change, feelings change, attitude changes. Everything comes first, except you.

I just smacked a fly in my room. DISGUSTING to the greatest sense of the word. only 2 legs remained on it. and it was like crawling on the floor. wadthefuck. if it wasn't in my room, i would have squashed it. FUCKED UP. my roomie saw it before lunch and couldn't be bothered. whatthehell la. and she fuckingly told me that she cannot be bothered to do anything. heyy, am I supposed to do it for you?! fucking shiat. pissed-.

haven't been in a good mood recently. got my french test though. it's a 92. have i mentioned that? everything is going fine. i must maintain my 9/10 average. i must i must.

and i must be better off than you.
i know i will.

Charmaine.@6:58 PM
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