StillMorphing, IntoWhat, IHaveNoIdea.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

before you guys think that i've ended up in the coffin, or without a coffin, i'm announcing that i'm alive and, maybe kicking. maybe not. been way too busy to even log on the net. bushed by the time i reach home. essentially, i can get some time off in the office to slack, but nothing is accessible here. no msn, no hotmail, no gmail, no yahoo mail, no youtube, no haoting / souting / or whatever-ting, blah blah blah. equivalent to something much worse than that of glion. what is happening over at MY side of Singapore, is work work and more work. a glimpse of what happened over the past erm, haven't counted how long i've disappeared.

was in LBSH for 3 full weeks, with one day of MC. fell dead on the 2nd day of my job. never felt worse in my life i swear. for the 3 full weeks i was physically drained, never had a flu that lasted so long. it was sore throat, cough, stuffy nose, fever. and THAT lasted for 3 weeks. ask me how i survived through the 3 weeks, i'd prolly tell you that it's not time for me to die then, i guess. that was the best time of my internship so far. with vicky, puteri, mogan, logen, andrew - the mumpties. then again, it was the worst with my favourite sister (da QUEEN) and her newfound best friend. oh well, fuck that. any-o-hows, people come people go. andrew went back to philippines, mogan left for another hotel, and there it is, less mumpties, more enemies. split shifts were crap, i wake up at 11am when i do my B shift, 930am when i do my A shift, and i won't be home till 12+mn everyday. i lost track of dates, lost track of time, practically lived the life of a zombie, with the other full time zombies. it was tough, yet it was nevertheless, the most interesting part of my internship, at least till now. as always, yours sincerely will never bother to put up a facade for such an insignificant figure (i.e. da queen), who is still that mere floor captain who speaks english, like greek. e.g. one who plays the piano - pianist. according to her, it's PIANONIST. applause* and her bf, the SOUS chef (when you translate in directly into french, it simply means UNDER chef) anihows, according to him, the duck terrine has to be served fast, because IT WILL MELTED. how do you expect me to prevent the degradation of my already-poor-level of english when you work with idiots like this?!

life turned for the better when i moved into the fnb office on the 3rd of Jan. supposedly better life, with a five day work week, attend meetings, briefings everyday. and this began to bore me quite a bit. i fell asleep during meetings, blah blah blah. most managers were really nice to co-operate with me with regards to my projects. saturdays became my working day again, since most managers weren't free to meet me on weekdays, then my boss wants to see me on saturdays as well, so it simply means, another working day AGAIN. when i'm finally on the way of completion, boss dropped me a bomb yesterday. a proposal to be done, to begin at 10am and to be submitted by the end of the day, because it goes up up and up to the area GM. the only thing i know is that i'm alive and kicking and happy after i got my new fone yesterday night and i thought that everything would be nice and pretty today, then boss wanted to see me at 11am. he wants another appendix and that was to be completed in 9 minutes. okie, the routine begins again. explained the proposal, he met the GM, happy happy, with only a foreword to do, and im over and done with the proposal, for now. GAWD. i wonder what is happening to my very sad life. another meeting to attend this afternoon, which is 1hour 38minutes away from now, and i haven't had my lunch.

ohhh before i continue, i would like to digress and mention about the significant weight loss and weight gain. weight loss during my 3 weeks in LBSH, dropped my clothes size by 1 or 2. now i guess, i should be back on track to my usual clothes size, but im still kinda able to squeeze into those smaller sized clothes. thank gawd i bought loads of clothes during that time, so by hook or by crook, im staying in those clothes.

yes, coming back to my current life, triste triste triste. aniways, aniwaes, anyways, i'm over him, and i'm into someone new. this is much worse, much older, much more useless. when i bitch about the queen and her bf, i think i'm condemning him a million times more than that. his english is, poof* not a tad more than that of a toddler who just learnt how to say papa mama. career? forget it la huh. still that pathetic one who chops veg for that asshole sous chef. he's already in mid twenties, so that's about it la.

ANYWAYSSSSSS, that's all for today ya peeps. this entry took me quite a few hours, realising that i've been stepping in and out of the office.

Charmaine.@2:30 PM
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Wednesday, December 20, 2006

i got my honours.

8.8.

UNHAPPY.

POUTS.

Charmaine.@1:08 AM
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Monday, December 18, 2006

FINALLY found a chance to blog. Guess everyone must have thought that I've vanished or something, gotta take this opportunity to apologize to every single one of you whom I'm supposed to meet sometime or another. Fell sick the weekend I returned to Singapore, still pushing myself to work on Monday (worked till an unearthly hour of 1am) and practically dropped dead on Tuesday. Hence, becoming the first intern ever, who is on medical leave on the second official day of work. Well O well, it doesn't matter. Working hours: 10.30 / 12nn - 3-4pm 6.15pm - 12+mn. broke down on thursday with regards to this. working environment is bearable with people like adrica and azlam. the rest are okie, but the fucking stewarding auntie simply has an issue with me, EACH fucking day. but who the fuck cares?! i gave her my piece of mind anyways.

yesterday was my first off day. headed down to vivo, taka, wisma, bugis and marina sq. fyi, i soiled my gucci shoes cause of my blister on my right foot. and mind you, i took a TRAIN down from bugis to city hall, disregarding the cabbing down from vivo to taka, and wisma to bugis. hahahas* and someone just couldn't differentiate between bugis and marina sq. vivo isn't worth sucha great hooha. metaphorically speaking, a bimbo. pretty on the outside, empty on the inside. i was kinda dead by the time we reached bugis, didn't really have the energy to crap in the train on the way to marina sq. my day was filled with noise, so much so that, i find it unbearable to live without it throughout yesterday. went to kino to get my french book, and i found out how the french language could be slaughtered so brutally when one can't speak french...

aller: in the french way - ah-lay
aller: in the ENGLISH way - ALL-ER

hahahahas* what entertainment.

and i met ALWIN NJOO. god bless me mann. IT IS SO DAMN FARKINGLY SCREWED. but can i mention that his dress sense was horrid to begin with?! it was so not the usual him.

***

on a more emotional note,

"Why haven't you found a bf?"

pause.

"Why must have?!"

GOBLOK.
must i spell it out that
YOU ARE STILL THE ONE.

***

what am i to do when you know things will never be?
and you just want to live with it this way?

'nuff said.

smiles still fill my life, pretty much.

Charmaine.@12:20 AM
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Tuesday, December 05, 2006

can't bear to leave switzerland VS homesick

i was in my jeans, rock and roll tee and nike bag when i first came here. it was raining, exactly the way it is now. then, filled with fear, anticipation, despair. i was too busy to cry, too busy to worry, everything fell in place, automatically.

4 months flew by just like that. leaving this place for the next 7 months, our council stepped down for the semester, my classmates leaving, moving, going away from this school, another welcome day ended like that, our christmas lunch and prize giving ceremony closed the semester. the many many things that have happened over this 120 days. be it good, or bad, i miss everything here. my PGD, PGC friends, hopefully in this 茫茫人海中 i will get to see them again someday.

my resolution is half fulfilled over this four months. my honours, shouldn't be a problem till now. but the other half of my resolution, will never be fulfilled even in the next lifetime i guess. promised mama that you will never be on my mind, at least by the end of this semester. mama must be so disappointed with me, no wonder she gave up on me forgetting you. sigh. you are really something...

to be continued...

Charmaine.@12:04 AM
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Monday, December 04, 2006

she likes him
she likes him
she likes him

and i like him.

he likes me

he likes you.

who are you?
who is he?
who is him?

this is driving me up the wall.

but i'm sure

you like him.

Charmaine.@1:45 AM
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Saturday, December 02, 2006

MUGGING IN PROCESS.

DO NOT DISTURB.

Charmaine.@7:12 PM
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i was so happy about my award, when the entire wotrld congratulated me about getting the award. Then the shortlisted idol from a country that starts with P, came into my room and told me "T and me can just not go for Accounting exam, since we need a negative 4.5 to fail our exams."

okie fuck. i feel soooo fucked up now, although i will definitely get my honours. the worse i will get is a 8.6. and with my additional 0.2 credit, i have no idea why i feel so fucked up. tell me that i will be fine.

anyhows, i am happy for now. at least i have my 0.2 extra credits. sigh.

Charmaine.@7:21 AM
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Friday, December 01, 2006

I have done you all proud.
Papa
Mama
Darlings
Besties
Girlies
Students

I didn't let you all down.

Most outstanding student award.
The only girl.
The only asian.

I did it. =)=)=)

Charmaine.@11:42 PM
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TWO DOWN,
THREE LEFT.

HOLD ON.
THAT'S WHAT I NEED TO DO.

***

SIX DAYS TO HOME.

I MISS YOU TO BITS.
just what can i do.
GAWD.

Charmaine.@2:45 AM
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